A Case Against Passion
When I was at my first job as a crisis counselor at Terros, my favorite co-worker led a very interesting life. His name was Jim. He had a master’s degree in social work. He didn’t own a car and didn’t have a TV. I think about him often. He opened my eyes to a new way of thinking.
He shared with me that he gets a new job every year. Staying at one job for any length of time, wasn’t good for him. He said that he gets bored too easily. One year, he milked cows for a living and the next year he was a scuba diver fixing bridges under water. At first, I was shocked. Who does that? I was taught that you find a career, stick with it, put away some retirement money and then retire. End of story.
Consumerism
What I liked about him was that he was carefree and not obsessed with finding that one thing (passion) that would get him hooked for life. The stories he told were captivating. He wasn’t on the consumer hamster wheel. He lived an authentic life free of cultural expectations. When boredom set in, curiosity stepped up for him to go on to the next best thing. He seemed blissfully happy and content.
Who says that we must find a career and stick with it? Americans have a fetish with passion. Well, what’s wrong with living a life well lived. He has a passion for life and life itself with all its magnificent directions.
Some of the most interesting people I know in their 40s, 50s, and 60s don’t have a passion. When we talk about passion, it can make these people uncomfortable that they aren’t living a legacy.
Is Passion Needed?
When I look at my friends, family members, and colleagues that I look up to in my life, I ask myself, “How many of these people knew their passion when they were young?” How many of them stuck to it, never veered right or left, knew exactly what they wanted to do, built their entire lives around it, and they are still doing that one thing. Basically, none of them.
Not having a passion doesn’t stop any of us from living a gorgeous, kind, complicated, whole heartedness lives. They aren’t tearing themselves apart looking for their passion. They were interested in lots of things.
When I am lost, broken, have a life smackdown, and failed, the very first phone call I make is going to be to someone like Jim. He looks at life like a carnival fun house, trap doors, hidden staircases, getting fired from this, trying new jobs, changing directions, and going somewhere else. Jim’s journey has taught him that you do not judge anyone for the path they are on.
Elizabeth Gilbert
I heard Elizabeth Gilbert, author of Eat Pray Love, speaking on this issue. She calls those that have a passion and go for it are like Jack Hammers. They jack hammer away at their passion. They get a lot done, they are obsessive, and loud.
Those that don’t have a passion are like hummingbirds. The move from tree to tree, flower to flower, trying this and that and building incredibly rich lives. They cross pollinate other people’s lives with their love and ideas.
Remember Passion
If you don’t have a passion, it’s okay. There are probably more people than not that don’t have a passion. Passion can even be a dangerous impulse. Pause for a moment and look back on your own life. Look at that passionate love story you had. How did it work out for you? What kind of turmoil were you left with when that passion was done with you?
Whether you have passion or not, I am sure you will build a rich life full of trials and tribulations, joys and sorrows, twists and turns, that can leave you exhausted and/or blissful. As the 14th century poet Hafiz said, “The place where you are right now, God circled on a map for you.”